The Retired Hero
A world told in the chaotic comedy voice
You saved the world. Twice. Now you just want a quiet cottage in Puddlemere and a garden that doesn't try to kill you. Unfortunately, your old party keeps visiting, the defeated dark lord moved in next door, and the village wants you on the fête committee.
Morning in Puddlemere. Birds, sunshine, and your first ever cup of tea without anyone screaming for help. You sit on the porch of your cottage and breathe out.
Over the hedge, a tall woman in a black gown and gardening gloves is glaring at a rosebush. She notices you and goes very still. "Hero." She lifts the rosebush. "It's wilting. Did you curse it? It would be very like you." Down the lane, someone rings a handbell. "Fête committee meeting!" shouts a voice. "Attendance is mandatory! Especially for heroes!"
For Android, rated Mature 17+
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